Transformers-A Cleverschmever Review (of sorts)

Last night, I walked into the movie theater wanting to write a review immediately after seeing Transformers. However, as the film progressed, I had an increasingly difficult time keeping a critical eye, as it had (what I call) the Superman Returns Effect*. As soon as I saw a helicopter turn into a robot, and then lay waste to a military base, my adult form was lost to my inner 6 year-old.

With that in mind, I will attempt a brief, relatively spoiler-free review.

As a whole, Transformers was a good film. It gave us a lot of robots transforming and then pummeling each other. That, after all, is all one should expect from a Transformers movie. As a bonus, we also got to see some great character stuff!

Optimus Prime, Megatron, Ironhide, Jazz and Starscream are exactly like their original (or G1, as the "hardcore" call it) counterparts. Optimus is the compassionate leader, ready to sacrifice himself for others. Megatron is the single-minded beast of a villain, whom all the Decepticons rally behind. Ironhide is the old badass, and Optimus' oldest friend. While not voiced by Scatman Crothers, Jazz retains that youthful, accepting and "hip" vibe he had, as well as his loyalty to his fellow Autobots (he even breakdances!). And Starscream? Oh, he's a bastard as always! Some oif the character is development is very subtle (especially Starscream's), but if you really watch the flick, you're in for a treat!

Oh, and Sam Witwicky? Much to my surprise, I loved Shia LeBeof's performance! Nearly all his interactions (human and transformer) are funny, especially when he corrects a Government Goon (John Turtorro) who calls Megatron some ridiculous initialism. "As they (the Autobots) call him, Megatron! He's the bad guy."

The plot is thin, it's just an excuse to see a giant robot brawl, and that's perfectly fine. In fact, I only have 2 issues with the movie. First, Bay will occasionally focus a bit too much on the humans. During the big Optimus and Megatron fight, he keeps cutting back to them. Why? All of us want to see Optimus vs. Megatron! Did you learn nothing from The Phantom Menace? Second, they treat one character's death with all the reverence of a fast food employee who gives you Hot Mustard instead of BBQ sauce. Then again, this is a Michael Bay film, so what do you expect?

So, dear reader, I can say this...Transformers is a fun romp through a world where giant robots can turn into cars and interstellar jets while destroying a city. You want to have fun for Two and a half hours? Have fun!

Oh, as a PS, the Cloverfield trailer (a new monster movie from JJ Abrams) is attached and it is the coolest trailer I've ever seen!

*The Superman Returns Effect tugs at a viewer's childhood attachment to the material on screen, making it difficult for the viewer (me) to maintain my usual ability to think while watching the film. Instead, the viewer gets wrapped up in a wave of pleasant nostalgia. It's named this because Superman Returns has a visually amped up version of the Richard Donner Superman intro.

As a bonus, here's a video of what I was afraid this movie could be...